The Blog Of Doom

Location: Castle Doom, Latveria

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Earl Got Your Tounge?

Greetings, peasants....

Doom thought that you, the peasants, should hear from your exalted leader (meaning Doom) every once in a while.....

So here's what's going on in the..(ahem) WORLD OF DOOM!!!!

LOST is on hiatus until February. Those Others bastards are pissing Doom off. Kate and Sawyer got it on while in a cage and Jack saw everything. This caused him to slice open Ben during surgery. Doom couldn't stop yelling at the TV for the last five minutes. Mr Eko is dead and Locke's the leader (damn hippie). Very cool.

Heroes is a great new show. Save the Cheerleader Save the World, bitch!!! Here is somebody with too much time:

Saw Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny. Hi-larious!! JB and KG are the greatest band in the world!

It's hard to be really, really good looking.

later, dawgs.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Good Robot Usses

This smells like Richards' doing......

BaH! One day Doom will show you all!

Saturday, September 30, 2006

London Bridge?

Doom has some ponderings Doom would like to share with the peasants....

"London Bridges" by Fergie....what is this London Bridge? What does it represent? Why is it the most annoying song ever? Does Fergie's drawbridge go up? Does it go down?

As Doom's serf Brendan would say (a musical math segment, if you will):

Kids Inc + crystal meth = Fergie

Yes, Fergie was on "KIDS INCORPORATED" along with Jennifer Love "Ghost Whisperer" Hewitt and that dude from Kids Inc in "The Monster Squad." You know you love that movie....Wolfman does indeed have nards....

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Compliment Doom?

Recently, Doom has been complimented via The Summer of Compliments blog. Doom is friggin touched!!!

Gosh.....Doom has been around for a while, letting the peasants read Doom's thoughts.

Okay, enough of that. Doom's armor will rust. And trust Doom, nobody wants that.

New season of LOST next week, pretty cool. Doom will more of an update on everything later, when Doom is less busy. Killing Richards is a full-time job, people!


Compliment Doom?

Monday, September 04, 2006

Crikey!! Snakes!

A moment of silence for that Australian Reptilian Adventurer known as the Croc Hunter. He's dead, bitch!!! Holy Crap!

Saw Snakes on a Plane with the great Samuel L. It's even better with audience participation. Pretty cheesey but damn good. Allow Doom to break it down.

  • Extreme Action Sports Guy/Witness suddenly developed an Australian accent in one scene of the movie.
  • Hot topless chick (and one half of the mile high club) got bit in a place that would be extremely painful. Did the snake die of silicone poisoning? Doom's joking, of course. They were very nice breasts. Really nice. Another dude got bit on his Johnson. See, that's why Doom's shit is armored. Try to bite that, snake!
  • The Captain of Sexual Harassment was on board, too. Best lines after Samuel L.
  • Best death scenes ever. Very painful looking. High heel through the ear gots to be painful!
  • Dick/Snooty British Guy was killed in a very ingenious way by an wide-mouth Anaconda right after feeding a flippin' ankle-biting dog (named Mary Kate) to it. Wow. That's all Doom had to say.
  • Samuel L. Jackson had the best lines since Pulp Fiction. When he stated the immortal line of "I'm sick and tired of these Motherfuckin snakes on this Motherfuckin' plane!" the audience went nuts. The physics following this monologue were ridiculous. Blame the Mythbusters.
  • Why they had a kickboxing champion on board who demonstrated no kung-fu-ery. What up with that?
  • Finally, props to Kel Mitchell. He landed the plane!! One has to see this scene to believe it.

Lata peasants.

Sunday, August 13, 2006


Doom would now like to review some movies, and pontificate.

Pirates of the Carribean II: Yarrr! Great movie, but you would have had to seen the first one to get a lot of the jokes. Can't wait for the third one, what with the cliffhanger. The cannibals and island were great, but reminded Doom too much of King Kong. Funny scenes, good action. Undead monkeys, great action scenes. A side-bar for a second: Doom was meandering through the local Latverian Blockbuster and saw this title on the shelves, oh-so-close to Lilo and Stitch: Pirates. Looks like "of the Carribean," but with less clothes. The plot line is exactly the same (except with Incan Gold) and the cover looks exactly the same, but it's....


Now that's funny.

Superman Returns: Wow. Good storyline, did something no other Superman movie did: Superman has a son. Who likes to crush people with pianos.

Clerks II: By far, one of the funniest movies Doom has seen in a while. One word for you: Pillowpants.

Sky High: Hey, it was free. Not the crapfest Doom expected. Interesting take on Superheroes. Doom sees good things for the villains, as soon as they get out of detention. There was even one who could stretch like Richards. He will, of course, die first.

Butterfly Effect: Highly depressing. Doom has a theory: whenever a comedic actor (like Ashton "Dude, Where's My Car?" Kutcher or Robin "JUMANJI!!!!!" Williams) has a "serious role" in a movie, they grow a beard. Do yer research and you will see Doom is always right! 'Nuff said..

Doom: Despite having a great title, this piece of crapulence served no point whatsoever. Has the future not heard of night-vision googles? But they have apparently abolished underwear for women, so a point in that column. The storyline was ridiculous and took the entire time to come to the point. The "first-person" shooter POV was stupid and looked like crap. The Rock does play a good increasingly-psychopathic Sarge and the fight scene at the end was pretty good.

Ultraviolet: Ugh. The special effects sucked and served no purpose. The storyline was ridiculous. Crap on a stick.

Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle: Greatest stoner flick ever. Hi-larious!

Grandma's Boy: Monkey, do you know Donkey Kong?

Unleashed: Jet Li in a dog collar, had killer kung-fu action.

Can Doom talk about The Hills for a second? LC threw away an entire career so she could be with the guy with the High School Beard. Stupida. That's Doom's only political statement for now.
Snakes on a Plane is next, beeyotch. And Doom got a phone call from Samuel L. himself.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

Ate! By a Shark! A Shark Goddammit!

Yes, it's been a while since Doom has posted. Tell Doom something Doom did not know.

Your Mom.


Doom will soon see Superman and Pirates 2. Excellent.

"We've got to get these motherfuckin' snakes off the motherfuckin' plane!"
With these words, Samuel L Jackson is the MAN once again. Snakes on a Plane. Doom saw the novelization (!) in a store and almost bought it. But Doom doesn't want to spoil the flick. Jackson's also Ultimate Nick Fury, dammit! Scope it here. Finally, Grand Theft America is here!

Almost 4th of July!!! Doom will have to barbeque some!